Long post...Prepare yourself.

About 4 or 5 years ago around this time of year I was sitting in a communications class in college. In this class I wrote a communications study about my friend group at the time (much of whom are still my primary friend group). This "communication study" was supposed to look into how each student interacted with their friend base and then annalyze that by using the vocabulary in the chapter, basically.

Mine, however... turned into an actual study in human nature and group interactions. I got an A on the project, but I also got strange looks for the rest of the semester AND my teacher offered to give me the name of SEVERAL counselors.

My study was on my group's process of NIX/ OFFER. (Also the name of my paper, just as a side note because did I mention that I got an A on it?!!) This is a phrase our group created to make decisions. If you have a decision to make within the group and several options have been offered but you, being one of many, don't want to do it, you Nix it. BUT in line with the plan you have to offer something. So, for example: You have a group of 10 people. One announces that he wants to go eat. 5 more people agree to that. now you have 6 of 10 and a majority. So, they're going to eat. Now where. One person announces McDonald's, another nixes McDonald's (probably me, I hate McDonald's) so now they have to offer somewhere else. The person that nixed, offers IHOP. Someone else nixes IHOP, they offer Applebee's.

See how it work?!! It works well when put into action.

The part where my teacher offered my names of counselors comes in when after class, after my brilliant presentation, she pulls me off to the side to have a conversation.

"Paige, I'm worried about your friends. It seems you guys have created a bubble which no one could ever penetrate. What's going to happen when you want to include a new member to the friend group? What happens when exsisting friends move away?"

So of course the time, this is what it sounded like, "blah blah blah...blah blah blah...blah."

Now, however, having had friends from the group move away and new members being added I completely understand what she was saying. BUT...and this is a big but. It didn't matter. Wait...Did I just say that my teacher didn't know what she was talking about? ... Yes, I believe I did.

Where she thought that we would have the inability to grow and change and expand as a group, that hasn't happened. Not only has our group expanded, but we are such a close knit group that even the members who have moved away are still "close" to us. Our processes within that group haven't changed, they've been adopted by the new group memebers. Everything that my teacher was worried about, hasn't happened.

Until now...

Up until now each new introduced person has been male. (That's right, oops, didn't see that one coming.) Now, all of the single, male members want to introduce females. So, the females have to fit in with the other pre-exsisting females in the group. uh-oh. Here in lies the problem. So the males are faced with this description from us female memebers, "You have to find a girl that we'll all like, then if you like her, fantastic." Ouch. I mean, we have the nerve to say that we have to like her, in fact, love her in order for the male member to even date her? Who the hell are we!! Well, We're the girls of the group and that's our right because those guys are in our care and have been for years.

Maybe we do have some emotional issues....surprise, surprise.

But as a side note, new girl introduced, new girl accepted. so AWESOMENESS! More on this later.